ALL HELL’S BREAKING LOOSE

It's late. My feet are tired, my back hurts, and my heart is heavy. The door to my room is open. No one is in the hall; it is quiet. It is weird; there is normally so much activity around here. I'm grateful for the twilight-zone-stillness. It is a much welcomed escape. None of it feels wrong. It is all right.

I am where I'm supposed to be. This is the arena I have prepared to enter. I am focused and my thoughts are clear. Yesterday felt like a mess, today feels like a major victory. Every day the battle goes back and forth.

I am still surprised at how tired I feel. I know it is not all related to physical exercise. There are days I do not get to run. Like tonight; I am tired; but I can't pinpoint why.

I am aware of the war I am physically preparing for. Every day, hour and minute is spent I preparation for it. Yet I doubt that is the source of all of my fatigue.

I suspect that I physically feel effects from the spiritual war that rages around me. I have left the safety of the church. I have marched into the enemy's territory.

Sometimes the battle seems completely one-sided. I feel the presence of God reaching out to those who have come seeking and I believe they are aware of it also. But there are other times when the doors seem bolted, chained and padlocked. He has control and My impact seems greatly diminished.

They all come seeking assistance but only some want the help of the cross on my hat; the others want the help of the captain's bars on my chest. I talk to all; but only some hear.

These thoughts create in me a desire for God to show me glimpses of the war being waged all around me daily. The spiritual war for people's lives and souls. If I knew the enemies strategies would I approach these encounters differently? I think so.

Might I pray, "Lord please remove the blinders that prohibit us from seeing and understanding the source and root of our pain and discomfort. Help me to see clearly and therefore to guide this individual into the light where the chains, traps and plans of the enemy can be exposed for what they are. May your Son Jesus Christ also be present and in that glorious light and unveil himself as the great hope of all mankind."

Hell is real. It is rising and threatening those we know and love. My hearts cry is that we, the church of the Living God, continue to improve our position and also move forward to the streets where the battle rages.

Only then will our hearts feel and experience the rest and peace that we long for when all is quiet.

 

I Looked into the Face of God

My last post was from a really different place. I closed it on a hope-filled and positive note but it wasn't easy. It was written at a tough time.

Not always, but occasionally my confidence gets rocked. I have doubts and worry about how I am impacting the soldiers for Christ.

I always think I have to bring Christ to the soldiers. What if it didn't only work that way. What if he was already out there and in some instances all I had to do was remind them of it.

Remember the verses in the Bible where God is describing all the ways that we encounter him here on earth? He describes our encounters with him in terms of the needy. He identifies himself with the hungry, thirsty, lonely, the down-and-out and the prisoner (Matt 25:35-44). Christ says that when we see those in need we are looking into his face. So the obvious question becomes "what is my response to Christ when he is uneducated, homeless, weak, smelly, begging or a criminal? What is my response when he is asking me to help or be compassionate to one of his children who are struggling?

I met with Jesus tonight. It wasn't in a church. I didn't have a bible. We weren't singing or worshiping and I wasn't fasting and praying.

I responded to another call for a visit from the chaplain. It was 9:30 in the evening. I was tired but in the area. I was not real optimistic. I remember wrestling with the idea of just calling it an evening. Maybe I would be fresher in the morning. I pushed on.

The soldier is about 20 years old and really frustrated with life and people and relationships and wondering why it all has to be so confusing.

This soldier incredibly and with great self-awareness closed several possible doors of discussion. He knew what he wanted and was able to articulate it

I was surprised. That is not the norm. He was on a mission, searching for something.

Eventually the conversation turned to spiritual matters. I found out the soldier was raised in the church and stayed there until he left high school.

He also told me he pretty much has not been back since. He has been trying to figure out this faith thing on his own.

What did Jesus mean when he said that we were helping him when we help those in need?

In what way does Jesus identify with these people? Is Jesus in this young man?

That would be very hard to establish…I can't tell you "where" he was. But I know he was there.

I believe that we both knew it.

I looked into the face of God. Tonight he is about 20 years old and he is hungry and thirsty.

My Cloud

I was walking around this morning very aware of an old feeling that had resurfaced and was following me around. I went to bed kind of aware of it. This morning in the light of day I could really sense it and I knew I was "outta sorts."

I might best describe this as a cloud over me. That is what it feels like anyway. And it is not a normal cloud. It is a sneaky, insidious little cloud that defies being spotted, understood or negotiated with. I used to get much more worked up about it. My frustration with it used to come out all over the place and was directed at any easy target in close proximity. That doesn't happen much any more. I am aware of it and can even acknowledge the presence of my unwelcome little companion before anything directs outward.

I will at times inform those closest to me that I am under the cloud if they cannot tell for themselves by the strange light cast from its shadow.

I refuse to stay there. I am constantly looking for the reason or at least a way through this and back into the light of day. Through the years I have come into contact with several methods that seem to help elevate me.

Excersise is one my my helps. I feel inspired and coem alive when my blood starts moving faster and the oxygen starts coming quicker. My thoughts clear and my spirit sores.

The best one for me is nature though. There are times when I can't get up the gumption to excersise. In those times I have discovered all I need to do is take a little walk with Jesus...outside.

Back home it easy for me to see the beauty all around me in any season. Here however this morning I found myself frustrated because I had not really been impressed with this desert. This place is in its own little way depressing.

So there I was, walking, outside, and kinda grumbling about out my situation. That is when it hit me. I mean really hit me, again (this is not the first itme). Here is a pic that I took on my walk this morning...


Do you see it? It is right there look again. Do you see it?
Hope "spring"ing forth right off the branch. Even in this barren and desolate place God is able to bring streams of living water to refresh the dry and weary traveler.

Spring is in the air. Spring reminds us that things change. You can bet your life on it. Things are going to change, for me, and for you, if we stay the course. The waters will come, the snow will come, things will cool down and God will be seen sitting on his throne high and lifter up..in control of everything. Amen

Learning to listen

With all the counseling that I have been doing I have been consistently recalling my training in seminary. One of the big ones for me is remembering the time when we taped "my" counseling session. I am a very visual learner. It is hard to forget a mistake when you actually watch yourself doing it. I remember the 80/20 rule we learned in class. The patient/counselee is supposed to speak 80% of the time and I/counselor am supposed to speak about 20% of the time. I had that firmly switched around in that first session. I spoke 80% and listened about 20%. I will not forget that lesson.

Things are changing for me now. When I listen now I want to understand before I say anything. It has become OK for us to sit in silence till they can put to words the reason they are coming to me. Silence can be awkward, but also necessary. It is at times a picture of what is happening in the person's life. The silence in itself speaks and reveals a part of the story. The challenge for us is can we sit with them in that moment. Are we willing, as Christians to experience another's pain will we in a sense pick up their cross and help them without saying or suggesting anything.

Simon, the Cyrene, who helped Jesus carry his cross is never recorded as saying anything. Not one word. Yet as we look back we can all see and sense the gratitude of our suffering Lord and Savior in that simple act. No words of advice, no exhortations…just silence.

Let us learn to walk with our acquaintances, those who come and are vulnerable to us, without trying to fix them until we know for sure that God is leading us to speak.

Please pray for me that I would continue to be lead by the Holy Spirt in the exploration of the pain and suffering of those he brings to my doorstep.

May the Lord expand your ministry also in this area of Christian ministry and allow you to be one who is able to bear the burdens of others in a way that opens them to the healing power and presence of our Lord and Savior. Amen

Look at this verse for additional reflection: Matthew 11: 28-30

McGregor Chapel Update

Last Sunday was probably the biggest military church service I have done. About 50 people. It felt like big peoples church. I was proud to have been a part of it.

Most of the technical elements went off on time and the music and power points were well organized. I thank my brothers and sisters at Center Point for teaching me and for suffering through all of my failed attempts of trying to minister in the 21^st century.

This week brought with it another first because I have had a continued increase in counseling among the troops. I have never experienced this much anxiety among troops in the military. I can't imagine what it must have been like when there were daily reports of soldiers dying in the places you were deploying to.

Many, many people come to talk to me. Every day brings new opportunities. Please pray that God would continue to soften and draw people's hearts to Christ. There have been days when every soul that came searching seemed to leave refreshed. I attributed those times to God's will, timing and the Holy Spirit's activity. I have not had that experience consistently though. There have been other times when counseling the troops seem dry and barren. In those times do I bless God and keep on moving? Do I attribute that activity to God's will and the Holy Spirit's lack of presence? I don't; I take it on myself in weird ways. I often feel up when ministry is good and feel down when ministry seems less successful.

I internalize the lack. I really wrestle with these things. What is the difference on a good day verses a bad day of counseling with troops? What impact do I bring into the scenario? Do my prayers or does my holiness impact the outcome of the session? How much? If I believe the affirmative of those questions why am I not constantly on my knees?

In the Old and the New Testaments I believe that there are indicators that lead us to believe that the outcome of our supplication is in part impacted by certain factors that are controlled by the individuals in the texts or situation. Faith and prayer are two elements that continually come into play. Right standing (righteousness) is another factor that needs to be examined.

I am more than willing to accept the fact that God reserves the right to do what he wants to do in any and every situation. That does not conflict with my understanding that occasionally he allows room for prayers influence. Prayer allows his children to experience a foretaste of the power and protection that will someday be ours completely in the next life. It doesn't conflict with the reality thatHe is guiding us, leading us, teaching us to reveal Christ to a watching and waiting world.
I don't want to miss a miracle. I want to be bold but not arrogant. I feel compelled to allow God to clear and clean my heart as much as possible so that I am not hindering what God wants to do in this world in and through me.
If we are not growing in these things. If we are not experiencing more than we expect, dream or imagine hten I think we are at times settling for less than what God wants to do int his world. It should compell us to search for what blocks and not condem us and make us even less effective. Let the word of God and the Spirit of God work together in your life.

Check these passages out…let them soak into your head and heart and flow out of your living…as you learn to run to him…

1 Chronicles 5:20
²⁰ They were helped in fighting them, and God handed the Hagrites and all their allies over to them, because they cried out to him during the battle. He answered their prayers,
because they trusted in him.

1 Peter 3:7
⁷ Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

James 5:16
¹⁶ Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

James 4:2-3
² You want something but don't get it. You do not have, because you do not ask God. ³ When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.

A False Sense Of Security

One of my favorite Max Lucado books is "In The Grip Of Grace." I have given it out to many new converts. I think it helps to establish a good foundation by enforcing God's incredible goodness and grace toward us. It is often what brought us and it is what keeps us when the bottom falls out.

But grace alone does not condition us for the fight that lies ahead.

We recently went through another class for improvised explosive devises (IED). I sincerely did not want to sit through another power point presentation and lecture on these things. We have had it several times in the last 6 months.

In the middle of it I pulled my phone out and played a little "brick breaker" (game). I got convicted; knowing I was not setting a good example and put it away. I made it through the rest of the day without incident.

The following day we reported and were going out on a convoy lane that had IED's planted all over the place. We were to employ the tactics and training we had received for this scenario. I was still pretty confident.

It wasn't long into the exercise before it all broke loose. They tore us up in a hurry. We broke down and failed to perform under stress just as they had anticipated we would.

They warned us, we failed. We started listening different after they told us they would reset the lane and we would do it again. Hands went into the air. Men were asking questions, planning, and plotting. It felt very serious the second round. We improved much, they told us we would.

It is an amazing flaw in the human condition that allows us to discount the warnings of others. Is it rebellion, arrogance or some crazy concoction of the two? I don't know. But I do know that it is universal. It affects the whole human race.

The spiritual application of this is very simple and similar. We cannot accurately know our own level of performance for our king. All we can do is train like the big test is tomorrow. Instead we often blow off the many warnings of the Scriptures and fail to apply the wisdom and teaching of those who have gone on before us. We under estimate the hatred and strength of our enemy and we are made ineffective and unproductive in advancing the Kingdom of God on behalf of our Lord, Jesus Christ.

Paul cries out to us as soldiers of the cross to take our training seriously (2Tim 2:3-4; 1Cor 9:7). He knows and has experienced the price that must be paid to advance the Gospel. He often uses competitive and even combative language to instill the correct attitude in his readers. The testimonies and teaching in the scriptures will save lives. If we want to succeed and receive the praise of our King we are going to have to daily assess ourselves: the good, the bad, and the ugly. Only then will we have the wherewithal to approach the battle in full armor and after having done everything
to stand your ground, stand firm. (Eph 6:13).

Just One Riesen To Live

I have been counseling a lot of soldiers. The majority of which are not Christian. Some soldiers who see me do not come because of my incredible counseling skilz. They come because they believe I can give the commander a referral for their discharge. Recently I have met with a couple soldiers who openly did not want anything to do with my faith. I do not push it and I am not offended in those situations. It is a part of my commitment to help every soldier in any way that I can regardless of personal faith, philosophy, color, creed, etc.

I am 42 years old. That makes me twice as old as the average troop in my battalion. I have had many years to iron the wrinkles outta life. I know who I am, how I'm wired. I am and have been securely in love with my wife for many years. I know what I'm doing vocationally till I die. All the really hard questions and challenges in life have been dealt with for me.

Some of the young men who come to me do so because they feel "overwhelmed" with where they are at. Throw in a new marriage, a new baby, a new unit, an old war and they are wondering why it is hard to sleep at night.

The stress and the concerns associated with any one of those things is enough. When you add them all together a young man ends up with runaway thoughts, sleepless nights and failing performance.

Suicide is way up in the Army and National Guard. The newest statistics given at our last brief were staggering. The overwhelming majority of deaths were Caucasian, 18-26, and infantryman. It was such a spike in the graph all eyes were immediately drawn to it. The young men in my unit run a higher risk (10x) than any other military profession.

The campaigns to get the word out are really good. The military's response seems appropriate. Now it is at my door step. They are coming, they are knocking, they are seeking. Some of them are walking a fine line and are peering over the edge thinking it would be easier to just give up.

It doesn't take much at that point. Just a little push or a little pull, one way or the other.

That is what I'm here for. I'm here to give them a reason to live. A reason to hold on, A reason to hope, A reason to believe that things can and will get better is only they do not buy into the lies this world tells them.

I recently discovered an old favorite; a candy from way back. It is a little something for those times when I'm missing the sweetness; the good stuff of life.

I love my chocolates. They are little attitude boosters. Wouldn't it seem silly not to share them with someone else in need if I believe it would help them too.

Isn't that what we do with Jesus though? Don't we hold him back sometimes? Aren't we reluctant to share?

The sweetest thing is life is definitely free, Share the sweetness today…

Blessings

To judge or not to judge?

Ya eva been judged? I have. I stood in front of a judge and was "highly encouraged" to consider joining the US Army. I deserved to go to jail. I had earned it. I was not looking forward to my paycheck that week. Then the judge and my grandfather conviened and I was allowed to go to see the recruiter too see if they could still get me into the military.

People have been coming up to me frequently here at Ft Bliss and starting conversations with me about how bad the world around us is. I wear a cross on my uniform and everyone knows that means I must have something to do with it. There could be many different reasons for this but I suspect one of the reasons hinges on the reality that if we see ourselves as one of the "in-crowd" (christian) then talking about how screwed-up those who are on the outside are should make me feel a little better about ourselves.

It doesn't work for me. I have tried focusing on the world and its problems but I can't do it with integrity. The world has always been screwed-up by God's standards.
When I read the papers I am not necessarily shocked.

It seems really weird for me to be standing in the world, while the world watches, and talk about how screwed-up they are.

Recently I did a funeral. After the funeral, in a very busy foyer loaded with family, a woman approached me and cleared her throat for my attention. I was initially talking to someone else. When I turned around she then, way too loudly, began to thank me for the sermon that day because there were many people present at the funeral who needed to hear my sermon. She was, in a very nontactful manner, making the undeclared statement that she was one who had heard and responded to the gospel, unlike her heathen family and friends watching and listening to us.

I did not feel compelled to jump in her boat and align myself with what she had just said. I wanted to crawl in a hole, not with her, but away from her.

No one wants to be judged! I believe the world is hyper-sensative to our message because they have all felt the sting of statements like that.

Should we be passing judgment? How and when? All of this caused a lot of study and a good sermon this past Sunday evening.

I focused on the difference between being a good judge and being judgemental. We are all called to discern (make judgments) between right and wrong, good and evil, falseness and truth. We are exhorted and commanded in the New Testament to excersize our faith in an authoritative manner.

But isn;t it true that we are also admonished not to judge lest we be judged (Matt 7)? We are and I think this is the verse many use to confuse the issue around judgment.

Remember this for me. We (Christians) must be willing to allow judgment to happen in our ranks (in the church) before we wil ever be able to minister to a watching and waiting world.

The key to all of this is attitude. A humble attitude that has examined itself in the mirror before examining someone else will be gentler and better prepared to guard against the temptation to self-righteousness and pride.

Here are some of the texts I used to prepared this study...
Matt 7:1-5
Ephes. 5:11
2 Thes. 3:6
Romans 16:17
Luke 12:57

Every Little Thing

I finished with my in-processing for deployment today. At the medical station I discovered that my records were misplaced. That means I got a few extra shots. One of the shots that I received was a pretty big deal. I was vaccinated for small pox. Before I was vaccinated they showed us several pictures of individuals who had not followed the instructions and became infected with the disease. It amazed me that they would show us those things right before they gave us the shot. Were they trying to instill fear? Were they trying to cause panic in us?

They weren’t. The truth of it is that so many of us have failed to heed their warnings they needed to become more and more dramatic with their presentations. The shot is not administered normally. It is administered by puncturing the skin 15 times with a needle. It in itself causes a wound that takes up to thirty days to heal.

Thirty days is a long time for a young man to nurse a wound that doesn’t hurt or have any of the visible signs usually associated with danger. We don’t fear what we can’t see or remember. The danger from small pox is microscopic in one sense but the effects are colossal and life changing.

As I thought about this I was comparing it to the problem of sin in our lives. The scriptures paint some pretty detailed and graphic images of the effects and problems associated with sin. Over and over again in the Bible we are warned of the damaging effects of sin.

God himself is described as one who hates and punishes wickedness and sin (Isaiah 57:21; Psalm 5:4)
In the book of Genesis (4:7) the writer describes sin like it is something very menacing lying in wait for us. This is not a new problem. The scriptures say that there is nothing new under the sun. It has all been committed before. It is easy at times to see the effects of sin.

We have all seen the effects of crack cocaine on a billboard using before and after pics. We have all seen the nightly news and listened to the horror stories our neighbors commit against one another. I think it is because we are prone to forget and we have become numb to seeing death and destruction all around us.

God wants to protect us from ourselves. We as his followers have the words of life. My prayer in all of this is that we are not afraid to become more dramatic in our presentation of the danger of sin to a watching and waiting world. I pray that we will worry less about scaring (offending) people and more about failing in our mission to point people to the way, the truth, and the life…Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen